The Cross of Gold

In the election of 1896 Democratic candidate, William Jennings Bryan traveled tirelessly on the campaign trail. He work feverishly, day and night, fighting for the farmer and the blue collar worker. He delivered a famous speech, saying "I will not crucify mankind on a cross of gold." It won acclaim across the country and was hailed as a defining moment for the Democrats and Populists who wanted to create inflation by coining silver and doing away with the gold standard. Frank Lloyd Baum even included a depiction of Bryan as the lion in his pro-populist, allegorical tale, The Wizard of Oz. An economic downturn before the election combined with corporate manipulation led to Bryan's ultimate defeat. Big business won another victory and laissez-faire politicians maintained the gold standard for a little while longer.

The nation was growing rapidly in the late 1800s. This nation, built upon the gold standard, began experiencing a lack of available currency. The population was growing, but the money in circulation was not. That is why many advocated for the coinage of silver. But captains of industry held fast to the gold standard. They argued that a currency backed by gold would prevent inflation. They maintained that gold would prevent detrimental fluctuations in prices, which may benefit the farmer in the short run, but would ultimately harm the economy through easy credit and overspeculation in the long run. This happened in the 1920s.

No one will contest that gold is a valuable resource. Most think of it merely as an aesthetic element, used to gild the halls of old buildings or as precious jewelry. But from an economic perspective gold equals stability. A gold standard ensures economic consistency and steadfastness (at least in theory).

It helps being a history teacher. You may laugh, but having just finished grading AP essays on this very topic, I couldn't help but conjure up images of late 19th century political cartoons while reading Scripture this morning.

Consider the following:
In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, if need be, you have been grieved by various trials, that the genuineness of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it is tested by fire, may be found to praise, honor, and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ, whom having not seen, you love. Though now you do not see Him, yet believing you rejoice with joy inexpressible and full of glory, receiving the end of your faith, the salvation of your souls. 1 Peter 1:6-9

Our faith is much more precious than gold. Think about that. Throughout the history of the world wars have been fought, lands have been discovered and conquered, people have been taken advantage of, sold, raped, killed, and political rivalries have arisen over the attainment of this one resource. And our faith is more precious than that! We should be seeking the refinement of our faith more intensely than England sought colonies. We should be petitioning for genuineness harder than Bryan campaigned for the presidency. To use Bryan's own analogy, we should be laying our plans, our quest for autonomy and self-sufficiency at the feet of the cross of gold.

At our church conference this weekend, Paul Tripp talked a lot about struggles and about the refinement that comes from them. I was reminded of many of the truths I learned throughout the past seven years. Essentially, "struggle is part of the plan." I thought back to my freshman honor's course when Tripp said that "it is not a denial of faith to say 'I'm struggling.' It is a denial of Scripture to say 'I'm not.'" Without this understanding, I don't know how I'd be able to function.

As Tripp reminded us, pain and suffering in themselves are purposeless. It is God that infuses struggle with purpose. Too often, I think, we pray to ask God to remove our trials. But 1 Peter 1.6 tells us to rejoice in them. James 1 says that trials produce steadfastness - like the economic theory behind the gold standard. I've tried to stop praying for God to end struggle. Sometimes I do, when I feel I can't take it anymore - but sometimes it's good to say to God "keep me here until I learn."

And that's what God will do. Two summers ago I prayed for God to end struggle. And he taught me patience. When one medical test came back positive, another came back negative. More tests. More waiting. They were the most agonizing months of my life. My plans for a teaching career in Virginia were suspended in mid-air and finally God brought me to a place where I could put my plans, my autonomy, my ambitions at the foot of the cross.

And just look what He did. He cultivated in me a deeper richer, faith. In the struggles of today I can look back at the struggles of yesterday and know that He is here now, just as He was then. And that is more precious than all the gold in our nations treasury.

Abiding and Moving Out

This time of year many offices downtown are getting an overhaul. Old employees are being replaced with new ones (much to the chagrin of some of my friends who worked for the old administration). Carpets are getting ripped up and replaced, furniture is getting moved and Obama is changing the curtains in the White House. Now on the one hand I’m incensed at what seems to be a frivolous and costly aesthetic overall at tax payer expense. It all started with Andrew Jackson. He was eager to erase the Federalist-elitist stench away from the John Quincy Adams White House. But that’s a history lesson for another day…

As Obama was being sworn in Tuesday the cameras panned over the White House and showed moving vans parked outside. Movers were efficiently removing Bush’s furniture and bringing Obama’s in. I was impressed by the ease of this transition. I’m sure that when the Obamas came home all of their furniture neatly placed around the Presidents’ living quarters and young interns were at their beck and call to move anything that was out of place. (Although apparently the staff was out to lunch when Dick Cheney decided to move some boxes on his own, only to end up wheelchair-bound) What kind of message would it send to the American people if Obama left everything the same in the White House? What if he did move into the Oval Office without changing the curtains? Maybe it would send the message that he’s the first fiscally responsible president in a long time; from a practical standpoint I’d be impressed. But even today our nation’s morale hinges a lot less on practicality and a lot more on pomp and circumstance, metaphor and symbolism. If we’re looking to the President to usher in change he can’t keep the White House looking the same. When Bush moves his stuff out, Obama has to move his stuff in.

I submit to you the following verses and you’ll see where I’m going with this:

First, heed the words of Romans 6: 10-14 – “For the death that He died He died to sin, once for all; but the life that He lives, He lives to God. Likewise you also, reckon yourselves to be dead indeed to sin, but alive to God in Christ Jesus our Lord. Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body, that you should obey it in its lusts. And do not present your members as instruments of unrighteousness to sin, but present yourselves to God as being alive from the dead and your members as instruments of righteousness to God. For sin shall not have dominion over you, for you are not under the law but under grace.”

-- Grace is the new administration. It’s time for a change. Just some more Scriptural backup:

Romans 8:10 “And if Christ is in you, the body is dead because of sin, but the Spirit is life because of righteousness.”

Romans 13:12-14 – “Therefore let us cast off the works of darkness and let us put on the armor of light…But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to fulfill its lusts.”

2 Cor. 5:21 – “For He made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.”

So here’s what I’m getting from this. Under sin our old nature was governed by lusts, temporal pleasures and all those things that the Bible is telling us to cast off. Why? Because we have a new nature! But even as someone who has been a follower of Christ for a long time, it’s still easy to live according to that old, carnal nature. And when that happens I'm living according to a nature that is actually not in me anymore! God has imputed a new spirit onto me. God has changed the administration. Why then do I often live according to those things that govern the carnal mind?

Perhaps if we’re not daily replacing the old stuff with new stuff we’re not going to have an effective transition. Maybe we have a new president, but if he didn’t replace the Bush cabinet with an Obama cabinet how far would that promised “change” go? Or if Obama just emptied out Bush’s cabinet and didn’t replace them at all then we’d just have Obama – and the new puppy - in the executive department. Great. But here’s the thing - if we’re going to make a complete transition of our hearts then we need to fill our minds and our hours with new things - things that are godly. We need to fill our minds with the words of Scripture and our time with service and spiritual disciplines.

Essentially, Christ needs to abide in us, all day, every day. “If you abide in me and my words abide in you, you will ask what you desire (read: godliness) and it shall be done for you. By me the My Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit, so you will be my disciples.” –John 15: 7-8

Broken

Judges 1: The book of Judges chronicles the brokenness of God's world. God's perfect world, created only a few centuries earlier, has come to such despicable degradation and filth. Here are some examples, just in one chapter of how the world was broken:
• Doubting God after Joshua's death
• Cutting off Adoni-Bezek's thumbs and toes and having him eat under the table
• Caleb giving his daughter as a prize for war
• The daughter pressuring and manipulating her new husband into getting land
• The tribes of Israel failed to drive out and kills the people that they conquered according to God's command
• Dwelling among the pagan tribes

In the midst of all of this sin we see the words "and the Lord was with Judah." Judah and Simeon actually followed God's commands. But verse 22 says "and the Lord was with them", referring to the tribe of Benjamin. So, even though the Benjamites sinned by not driving out the Canaanites, God was still with them. Throughout the rest of the book, and the rest of human history that God is still with these sinful people. It's true though, they messed up their lives. I wonder how the current political situation would look today had they followed God's command to exterminate the Canaanites. I wonder if the Diaspora and the pogroms and the Holocaust and Muslim terrorism would have happened. From Judges on Israel will face centuries of conflict because they refused to drive out these pagans. But even this, we know, is part of God's good plan. As Dr. Mills always said, it is part of the story. A story that will ultimately give the most glory to God. And to paraphrase John Piper - sin is part of God's plan. He does not condone it, but it can have a part in His work in the world. Working in an through the sin of mankind God shows just how good He really is.

Starbucks.

Starbucks, downtown DC. It is a good place to find an inauspicious corner and observe the mosaic of life. Two men over there are networking, getting their foot in the door to the new administration. Two old hippie-types enter in flagrantly anti-Bush t-shirts. People are texting, conversing with their friends across the table and across the world on matters great and small. A line forms at the counter as people seek repose from the blustery November afternoon. And I look down at my coffee cup, sip the bitter roast and see in it a powerful metaphor.

I’m really growing to enjoy black coffee. For the past two weeks I’ve abstained from all cream and sugar and found in it an immensely enlightening experience. I used sugar (substitutes) to numb my taste buds to the bitterness, but at the same time escaped a lot of the richness in the grind. Now I can really taste coffee. I can tell a good roast from an inferior one. I love my coffee and its satisfying bitterness.

I am reminded here of an article I read by Carolyn McCulley called Eat Bitter. Read it if you have a moment. And from there I turn to 2 Corinthians 12:10 where Paul, speaking of his thorn in the flesh rejoiced even in its persistence, for when he was weak, then he became strong. James 2 says, “Count is all joy my brothers when you face trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness.”

It’s easy to douse suffering in the sweeteners of life. These are things that aren’t really good for us, though not bad in moderation. However, their flaw is that they mask the taste of the bitter cup of suffering. It is this suffering that produces the gold, refined through the fire. In attempting to eradicate the bitterness we also miss the richness. The richness of living in weakness, in pain, in the hand of God Almighty who sustains his children in weakness. Now, lest you misunderstand, I’m not suggesting that we live complacently in bitter circumstances brought about by sin in our lives. In those times we should be cutting off the hand and gouging the eye. But when God places us in circumstances completely within His will we should, as Jim Eliot so aptly told Elizabeth, “be all there. Live to the hilt every situation you believe to be the will of God.”

DC is a “type-A” city. You notice this if you sit in Starbucks for three seconds. Relationships are about networking, time is of the essence, we’re all trying to get ahead, to make the most of our lives, our talents, our resources. We strive for a painless, prosperous life and see this as our right – “life liberty and the pursuit of happiness.” Those words are, after all, enshrined in this great city. Unfortunately, this “type-A” mentality of mine often seeps into my spiritual life. When I’m suffering I feel that I’m not “getting ahead” and I’ll do whatever necessary to change that. Immediately! I often find myself striving to change circumstances on my own timetable, outside of God’s perfect provision. But when we step back, when we drink the black coffee, the bitter cup, there we find a richness beyond compare. We find that God’s greatest gifts are bestowed in moments of weakness and brokenness.

Paul says, “For I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content: I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need.” (Philippians 4:11-12) When I can say this with Paul it is then that I find grace beyond compare. I find a God who is richer, a Word that is more powerful, a heart weakened and malleable.

So, if you are tempted to cease rejoicing in suffering - for you, there is a Starbucks just around the corner.

Why is critique spelled with a K? - Debate, shoes, and the concept of “cool.”

I was not cool in high school. In fact, I was probably the epitome of socially awkward, dorky, and fashionably inept. I made up for it by being class Salutatorian and figured that college was where it was at. At college I would reinvent myself into “cool.”

In college I tried very hard. Started straightening my hair every day, wore these ridiculously painful shoes to class and eventually realized that again, I did not have what it took. Just like in high school. I wasn’t friends with the “cool” people. You know, the soccer team/SGA types. It took me a couple of years to fully become okay with that but eventually the painful shoes stayed in the back of the closet and I was all about the imitation Birkenstocks.

By the time I graduated I learned that I really did not want to be the SGA type of cool after all. And then I stumbled into debate.

It was my second week at BWHS when I was asked to head up the debate team. It sounded kind of fun, but I really had no idea what I was agreeing to. I remember the first tournament – I was scared, I thought everyone was so weird, so intense. There were sixteen year olds throwing around words like hegemony. Then there was this whole other language. Flowing, topicality, counterplan, solvency, link-turn, impact analysis. Why was critique all of the sudden spelled with a K? Then we start abbreviating things. You run DA’s, go for T, perm the counterplan. And why the heck did everything end in nuclear extinction?

I’ve been a coach for a year, I went to camp, I learned to speak the language, and here is what I love most about it: it gives nerds that opportunity to really fit in – to be “cool.” We’re a part of something. We have our own jargon. Kind of like Trekkies and Klingon, only less jumpsuits and more ties and blazers. In the judge’s lounge you meet college students reading Heidegger, economists who work on the hill writing CRS reports, the debate mom who makes awesome lasagna and doubles as a nuclear weapons inspector, periodically traveling to North Korea and Iran. In the cafeteria kids are talking about federalism, Obama, the bailout bill, Obama, the pitfalls of wind energy, Obama, and whether or not Renewable Portfolio Systems provide an incentive for alternative energy. Most of these kids have spent two or more weeks on college campuses during the summer researching their cases, writing briefs and talking with a pen in their teeth to improve speaking ability. They haul around large plastic boxes full of expanding folders. The intense ones have carts. Most of their boxes are covered in bumper stickers advocating a variety of liberal causes.

This is just a snapshot. Back in the classroom from 4-5pm three nights a week mass quantities of Twizzlers are consumed, everybody talks at once and if we’re lucky we get about half an hour of solid practice in. They show up before the first bell the next morning, just to hang out in my room and get passes to come in later. They stay after on Friday, just to hang out and play annoying music on my speakers. I had to kick them out of my room at 5:30 this Friday. Tell them to go home and get a life, “If only for a few hours before I see you again at the crack of dawn tomorrow [Saturday] morning.”

They think I’m “cool.”

I’ve never been cool before. Peers never thought I was “cool.” Whenever I’ve worked with kids in some kind of church ministry someone else has always been the “cool” one. Someone else who has all this charisma, who can jump around in an absurd costume or shoot basketballs in the gym. But not anymore. My debaters aren’t really impressed by people who do all those other things. They think that’s annoying. They’d rather see someone with a sarcastic sense of humor and an appreciation for SNL. I guess that’s where I come in.

It nice to finally be “cool.” It’s nice to have a place where I’m normal, where my sense of humor is shared and appreciated. I laugh a lot when I’m in debate world. I know, I know. I’m 24, why should I care about being cool? In reality, it’s not so much about being cool. It’s about being who you are. It’s really only been in the past year that those waves of insecurity fostered in college have finally subsided and I’m just okay with who I am today. I guess I’m a late bloomer in that respect. Debate really had little to do with that, but how coincidental that once I finally became okay with not fitting in, then I finally found a place to fit in.

This morning I stood in my closet and observed my shoes. I’ve long since gotten rid of all my painful, stylish shoes (they say DC is the least fashionable city in the US, once again, the right place for me). I had to choose between my leftover-from-college imitation Birkenstocks and my brown Sketchers. I chose the Sketchers. Then I went off to a debate tournament. My kids won trophies. That made me happy.

Grace My Feet

I’ll walk with grace my feet, and faith my eyes. –Derek Webb

A few nights ago I found myself on the Appalachian Trial at about 11 pm. This was not by accident and it was not unplanned, it just happened to be one of those moments when, caught in time, you wish you could suspend the passage of it, and soak in the mountain vista, the fresh night air, the stars, handcrafted above for God’s glory and our amazement.

Walking back to our car that night I found myself without a flashlight and relying solely upon the light carried in front of me. That was fine. I followed the footsteps of the guy ahead. Watched closely his feet as they navigated the rocks and crevices in the dimness of that small light. And it felt good. Felt good to have someone go before. Someone who tripped a couple times, but kept going.

Sometimes it’s good to the be follower. I’m generally the leader. Or at least the “facilitator.” (That’s the trendy things in education now, to be the facilitator of learning, and since I’m young and trendy I guess that makes me a facilitator, not a leader) But anyway, I generally find that in my life outside of school I like to step back and let other people lead/facilitate. I like to be able to follow someone else’s footsteps, rather than being the one to lay the tracks.

And yet it makes me thankful. Had I not had footsteps to follow all of my life, how could I be in this place today. And as I’ve been reading through the books of Genesis and Exodus, being more and more confronted with the failures of our faith’s forefathers, I see ever more clearly that its not always about having a perfect guide to follow. Sometimes we do not see. Sometimes the light is dim or the air is cloudy and all we can perceive is a rough shape in front. As the Scripture says we perceive very dimly. And yet the day will come when we see face to face. When finally time shall be suspended. When that exquisite mountain vista, that moment of pure joy is a state of permanence. I’m looking forward to someday seeing the One I am following. But in the meantime, I’ll join the throng of others who are following Him with me. We may fall at times, we may lose sight of the goal, but we’ll keep in step. And by grace we'll hear the words "well done" at the end of our journey.

She is Running

Friday was “College-wear” day. So I drove to school wearing my Cedarville garb, listening to a Casting Crowns song on the radio. I’m not really a Casting Crowns fan but during college, at a time when I was questioning the role of the church and what our ministry should look like, this song resonated with me. The song is called “Does Anybody Hear Her” and in the lyrics I saw faces. Faces of girls that sit in my classroom everyday. Don’t be fooled by the three car garages.

The song talks about how these young women are searching, hurting “ beneath the shadows of our steeple.” How ironic, I thought, as I pulled in the school drive. I have the pleasure of attending church in the same building where I teach. On Sundays the high school becomes a house of God. On Sundays you won’t hear profanity in the hallways. Dating is called “courtship” and most of the books referenced are written by God or John Piper. It’s truly a world transformed.

[People sometimes act stunned when I tell them that I’m a high school teacher. Usually it’s because I look so young. But you get your occasional homeschooler who has been raised to think that the public school is a bastion of every evil and godless doctrine and when I tell them how much I love the public school they respond with appropriate astonishment. But do you know who I feel sorry for? I feel sorry for all the people that work in those office buildings along 28 and the Dulles Toll Road. I feel sorry for the people with nothing but a cubicle and a computer. Sometimes I wonder what people could possibly be doing all day in those buildings. It must be such a tedious and unimaginative existence.]

A few days ago a girl in one of my classes ran away from home. The Casting Crowns song on the radio told her story. My heart breaks for all of these girls. I wish I could lift them out of their insecurity. I wonder, what and who will guide them as they embark upon life outside our walls. And if there was some way I could save them from themselves, I would.

God called me to the public school, he gave me a heart for this place. I’ve never been so sure of anything. I don’t know how many times I thanked God on Friday for my job, and then that college is over. Cedarville was good, but I just wasn’t made for the Christian subculture.

It’s great to be at a place in life where you are just as excited to get up on Monday morning as you were on Sunday morning. I am blessed. Exhausted, overwhelmed, but immeasurably blessed. I love listening to my students recite their lines for the play, honing that British accent. Or seeing them in their football jerseys, ready for the game. And of course my favorite moments are during debate practice--the laughter, the banter, the political digs and sarcasm. The moments when I can see these kids in just a few years taking over the world. And hopefully that will be a good thing. I am glad to have this chance—this amazing opportunity to be the light that chases away the shadows of our steeple.