Why I've Run My Last Half Marathon

Last Saturday I ran my second and final half-marathon. I crossed the finish line knowing it would be the last time in my life I experienced the pure exhileration of finishing a 13.1 mile run. And I was ok with that. In those post-race moments my feelings of joy, relief, and utter exhaustion were so overwhelming that I felt like I was floating through the medal tent and food station (maybe I was, I couldn't really feel my legs). I'm glad I did it.  I proved to myself that I can run, that I'm no longer that girl coming up last on the gym class miler, that I have the self-discipline to master a painful and often tedious activity. However, over the past year I've decided that it's not exactly healthy. Not for me, anyway. There are those that love to run for hours and those that don't. I've finally accepted the fact that I'm in the latter category, and no matter how fit I am, I will never love running for more than six miles.

I came to this realization on top of a mountain in Ireland. Climbing upward, I found myself truly enjoying not only the view, but also the the sweat, the pumping heart,and  the burning legs. Even in the second and third hour of the hike I was still enjoying it in a way I never enjoy the second hour of a long run. I realized that THIS was what I wanted to be able to do for the rest of my life. Hiking through Ireland gave us a free pass to some of the most beautiful vistas along with many untrodden nooks and crannies. We did our best to avoid anyplace with a parking lot full of tour buses. This "off-the-beaten-path" tourism required a good deal of sweat, some well-worn hiking shoes, and a bit of hard pedaling up dirt roads. We bypassed the Blarney Stone for the Wicklow Mountains and skipped Bunratty Castle so that we could hike 11 miles on the Ring of Kerry.  We purposefully avoided the more touristy sites on the Aran Islands in favor of biking around Kilronin on our own, exploring ancient ruins in out-of-the-way places and quietly enjoying the magnificant cliffs in the company of birds and dairy cows.

Through it all, I realized that THIS is the purpose of staying in shape. I stay in shape so that I don't have to see the world from the windows of a tour bus. I stay in shape so that I can walk my dogs without getting dragged down the street in hot pursuit of a passing squirrel. (If you've ever walked multiple dogs, or just one big dog you know what I mean.)  I stay in shape so that I can fit comfortably into an airplane seat and buy clothes at normal stores. I stay in shape so that I don't have to take lots of pills or have joints replaced when I'm old. And yet, none of these things require me to get up at 6:30 every Saturday morning and run for two hours. Basically, I enjoy being active, I enjoy being healthy, I DO NOT enjoy running for half the morning.

I also realized this summer that long-distance running is actually increasing my chances of knee problems in old age. If running a half-marathon, something I don't love to do, is getting the way of climbing mountains, something I do love, then it's completely illogical for me to keep running half marathons. I do enjoy running in moderation, and I will continue to run 5 and 10Ks, but it's rather silly for me to spend a significant portion of my free time doing something monotonous and potentially detrimental.

Tomorrow is Saturday, the first Saturday in a long time that I will not wake up to an alarm. When I do wake up I will go for a bike ride while listening to my audio books. I will walk my dogs and I may even go apple picking. I will not be icing my knees, sliding down the stairs on my butt, or popping blisters on my toes. Hopefully when I'm 70 and standing on top of a Himalaya, I'll be able to say that I still have all my original parts. Regardless, I'm sure I won't be saying that I regretted all those Saturday mornings I spent enjoying myelf, rather than proving myself.

My Summer Reading "Soundtrack"

One of my all time favorite things about summer is the ability to read with reckless abandon. This summer  I've been traveling, tackling numerous home improvement projects, and perfecting my "locavore" lifestyle by picking, freezing, and canning all sorts of farm fresh produce. I wouldn't have nearly enough time to read if it weren't for audio books. While painting my basement I listened to Into the Woods a detective novel set in Dublin, full of quirky and amusing characters, a suitable number of plot twists, and an ending that, if not completely satisfying, did wrap up the various plot-lines and solve the mystery. I picked blackberries while listening to The Goldfinch a widely acclaimed novel by Donna Tartt. I have yet to finish this book, but it is proving to be a darkly fascinating tale of a young man, a priceless piece of art, and a world that seems utterly against him. We meet all sorts of shady characters from the high rises of New York City to the seedy underbelly of Las Vegas. Of course, road trips provide the best venue for audio books. This summers' first road trip was graced by Jennifer Senior's nonfiction expose All Joy and No Fun, a sociological look at the evolution of parenting, and the multifaceted demands, judgments, and expectations that parents face from their children and their community. Most recently, I've been listening to War Brides by Helen Bryan. This book started out a little slow but has picked up in intensity. Though the aforementioned "war brides" residing in the English hamlet of Crowmarsh Priors are not exactly kindred spirits, they are, for all their flaws and foibles a likable bunch. They are humans. They are not paragons of patriotism and courage, but normal women facing the threat of German invasion and worrying about their family members on the Continent all while eating "carrot fudge," smuggling ration booklets, and complaining over the cramped conditions of air raid shelters.

Despite all of my summer projects I've also found time to sit by the pool, on the beach, or in a plane with my nose in a book. Recently, I've had several people ask for some recommendations. So here are a few of my favorite books this summer: 

#1: The Girl Who Came Home by Hazel Gaynor - This is the story of a girl who travels to America on the Titanic (well - at least part of the way on the Titanic, that is) and lives long enough to tell her tale to her great-granddaughter, 70 years later.  I began listening to this book shortly after visiting the Titanic Museum in Belfast earlier this summer. While the story is a work of fiction, many of the details about the ship, its crew, and some of its more famous first-class passengers are true. Gaynor even uses exact quotes from actual telegrams sent in the fateful moments before the accident. In one such instance, the telegraph operator, a minor character in the book actually used the words "shut up" in his reply to another ship which was warning of icebergs in the vicinity. I remember reading that message in the museum, and the book's depiction was spot on. But I'll have to admit that the main reason I loved this book was that I became totally and fervently attached to the main characters. They were all such good people. I don't usually read books about nice people!  Throughout the book I was really truly rooting for lovers to be reunited and for friends and family to find one another. And the ending? Well I won't tell you that, but I will tell you that it was satisfying. It was as close to a Disney ending as a book about the Titanic can get! Move over Jack and Rose - this is a MUCH better story. 

#2: Cinnamon and Gunpowder by Eli Brown - I'm not sure if I loved this book because I'm an AP World History teacher, or because I'm a redhead. Cinnamon and Gunpowder is the story of redheaded female pirate, Hannah Mabbot, and her captured chef, Owen Wedgewood, whose survival depends on his ability to concoct gourmet meals using whatever foul items happen to be in the ship's galley. The chef, who formerly served the head honcho of the Pendleton Trading Company (a.k.a. The British East India Company), is at the outset terrified of this redhead whose brutal punishments and unrelenting demands characterize her as nothing short of demonic. The chef is firmly attached to God and Country, so it takes him awhile to see the world from Hannah Mabbot's anti-imperialist point of view. Through a blend of ferocious tirades, sarcastic humor, and no little bit of brooding, this pirate slowly convinces her captive to take her side and fight the Empire, avenging the numerous atrocities perpetrated by the Pendleton Trading Company.  I must admit, despite Wedgewood's reticence, I loved Hannah Mabbot from the start - but then again, fiery redheads are my thing. This pirate's dry humor and ardor for justice make her my favorite fictional character of the summer. I laughed. I cried. And if I knew her, I'd join her crew, fight her cause, and enjoy some gourmet mussels along the way. 

#3 & #4: Shanghai Girls and Dreams of Joy by Lisa See: These last two books comprise a two-part series. The story begins with two sisters from a respectable Shanghai family. When their father loses the family fortune, Pearl and May find themselves forced into into marriage with two Chinese brothers who are emigrating to America. After a rather miserable double wedding, Pearl and May, are to follow their new husbands to America. However, history intervenes in the most tragic ways. Japan invades China, and Japanese soldiers storm the Chinese countryside raping women and children as they go. Finally escaping to America, the sisters find themselves navigating a complex immigration process at Angel Island and then adapting themselves to a difficult and disappointingly unglamorous life in America. With the end of WWII and the advent of Communist hysteria in the United States, Chinese immigrants are increasingly targeted and held under suspicion by the U.S. government. This is where the second book picks up. Pearl's daughter, Joy, faces the typical struggles of a second-generation minority. Frustration with her parents' backward Chinese values leads to her to join an underground student movement supporting the values of Chairman Mao and Communist China. When her disagreements with her family push her over the edge, she travels back to her mother's homeland, seeking a Communist utopia. What she finds is a country in the midst of the "Great Leap Forward" a national campaign to ramp up production, which only led to the squandering of China's environment and resources. This actual leap "backward" resulted in massive famine, cannibalism, and thousands of children left to die by the side of the road. Pearl undertakes a treacherous journey into her Communist homeland to save to save her daughter. While Pearl, May, and Joy are completely fictional, their lives represent the experiences of so many Chinese and Chinese-American women. The suffering they encountered was real; the novel presents a stark, disturbing, and honest portrayal of the lives behind the history books. These two novels, characteristic of all Lisa See's works, not only give a face to Chinese history, but also help Western readers gain an acute understanding of Chinese culture, values, and the many harrowing struggles faced by Chinese women throughout the centuries.

"Lake Wobegon Days" and Saturday Nights with Garrison Keillor

Lake Wobegon Days is the only novel I've read where the main character is a town. The town of Lake Wobegon is technically fictional, yet all too real for those of us who grew up in, and thus grew to love, small town life. The book was charming because the town is charming. It was a montage of stories depicting the town's conception and infancy, it's growing maturity, and the new tidings offered by the four distinct seasons. There was no one plot that followed the book from beginning to end, just a host of quirky townspeople connect through the generations by their association to this one picturesque like hamlet on Lake Wobegon.

Garrison Keillor brings us tales from Lake Wobegon every Saturday evening. I purposefully set my clock by A Prairie Home Companion. At promptly 6 pm every Saturday I set down the book I'm reading or the papers I'm grading and turn on the kitchen radio, perennially tuned to our local NPR station. I know this sounds "so 1930s," but I can't help myself. It's a ritual more akin to my grandparents' generation. In our day of DVRs and Netflix, who sets their clocks by a show anymore? Much less a radio show! But I'm old fashioned and I like it. The delight of listening to Garrison live offsets any temptation I might have to venture out on a Saturday night. (Unless of course, it is to see him broadcast live at Wolf Trap - a recent treat that thrilled me beyond all explanation).

For two hours Garrison Keillor provides our evening's entertainment as we prepare, eat, and clean up dinner. The voice actors use their bygone art-form to satirize old-time radio shows. We've become quite attached to Guy Noir, the bungling private eye, and that lonely, guilt-inducing mother whose screeching voice makes us cringe and laugh simultaneously. I'm also rather entranced by the parodied advertisements for Bebopareebop Rhubarb Pie and Powdermilk biscuits, both of which sound delightful in their apparent disregard for the trending food movements outside Lake Wobegon. Neither of these items is fresh, local, or devoid of carbohydrates, but I feel like people in Lake Wobegon don't worry so much about carbohydrates. Whatever gets them through that long cold winter can't be that bad.

I don't have the slightest inkling of ever living in Minnesota. I'm not that hard-core. Yet, at this time of year I always find myself a little homesick for my own "Lake Wobegon." I can't stop missing a little town in Western New York where the winters are only marginally better than those in Minnesota and everybody knows everybody else's quirks. It's a place where people don't have perfectly manicured lawns devoid of dandelions, they don't freak out about ticks every time they go outdoors, and they don't find it necessary to refrigerate all the buildings during the summer.  One day perhaps we'll retire to that idyllic little place - if I can convince my husband to move so far from "civilization."  (Though I'm sure he'll bring his more "civilized" views toward dandelions with him.) In the meantime, we'll enjoy our quaint little Saturday night ritual for as long as Garrison Keillor has stories to tell.

"And that's the news from Lake Wobegon, where all the women are strong, all the men are good-looking, and all the children above-average." 
- Garrison Keillor

"Orphan Train" by Christina Baker Kline

Set in Minnesota and Maine in the 1930s and 2011, respectively, Orphan Train weaves together the stories of two orphans, living in the same town, two generations apart. When Molly, a seventeen year old foster kid, steals a book from the local library she finds herself doing community service in an elderly woman's attic. Day after day Molly, and the 90-year-old Vivian sift through boxes of Vivian's things, purportedly to clean them out. In reality, the attic holds a Pandora's box of memories, memories that are not thrown out or donated, but neatly folded, boxed, and labeled while stories are told.

Vivian tells Molly of her journey from Ireland to New York City, her life in the tenements and the tragic night when she became an orphan. She was packed on an orphan train bound for Minnesota. In Minnesota she is at first taken in by a couple who forces her to work as a seamstress in the family business and sleep on a cot in the closet. When the Depression sinks their business, Vivian, then called Dorothy, becomes a "mother's helper," little more than a slave of the Grotes who are a poor and shiftless family living outside of town with too many kids. Her only solace is school and her teacher Miss Larsen. Miss Larsen ultimately saves her from an abusive situation and finds her a kind and upstanding family to take her in. Her name is changed to Vivian and she is gainfully employed at the couple's general store. She gradually builds the business into a thriving enterprise.

As Vivian tells her stories of loss, heartbreak, and ultimately, second-chances, she is at the same time offering a second-chance to Molly. Molly in turn, uses the internet to help Vivian track down and reconnect with long-lost family. In the process this unlikely friendship between a 90 year old woman and a teenager sporting the Goth look becomes a serendipitous chance at redemption for the both of them.

What I enjoyed about this book was its wholesome, neatly packaged conclusion. Every once in awhile you need a book like that to remind you that there is good in the world, that the quest for unconditional love and "family" can be found - even when that family is unconventional or unrelated. There is nothing quite so hopeful as the story of an unloved waif, taken from the streets to a warm and clean home where goodness and compassion gradually build into love.

"The Circle" by Dave Eggers

The Circle is a hyperbolic, yet strikingly haunting cautionary tale of our society's rapid retreat of from privacy. The novel tells the story of an ambitious young woman named Mae who has just landed a job at a groundbreaking tech giant called The Circle. At first I thought the "the Circle" was meant to represent Google, but apparently The Circle is the next best thing. The Circle has taken over and filled the gaps. It has given all individuals one user account through which all social, business, and even domestic transactions occur. (Think Google+Amazon+Facebook+Twitter+LinkedIn+Pinterest+etc = The Circle.) The Circle is everywhere and its rise to preeminence makes it a happening place to work.

The problem is that The Circle is everywhere. Innovators at The Circle have created ingenious mechanisms to make every facet of life not only controlled by The Circle, but also public. Politicians go completely "transparent," meaning that they wear a camera around their neck at all times so that all their interactions are live-streamed and broadcast to the world. Their followers, or "watchers," can comment on their every move from the cookie they ate for breakfast to the approval granted in high-level committee hearings. These inexpensive cameras can be surreptitiously hung in homes, on street corners, and just about anywhere humans frequent. Thus, any crime, any instance of domestic abuse, any call for help can be immediately seen by millions and attended to almost immediately. Genealogy can be tracked back to the Middle Ages, dredging up family history best left in the past. Online identities are not concealed. Since everyone's Circle account is tied to their credit card real names always appear in comments and postings. While ridding the internet of anonymity has indeed made users more civil, what we find is a world where expectations for communication have drastically risen. Friends take offense at the slightest delay in "liking" a post, accepting a invitation, or signing a petition.

This is not some futuristic dystopia where the government is imposing strict surveillance on it's people (though it would be easy for the government to do this if it wanted to, since The Circle has all the information) No - this is a society in the not-to-distant future where individuals choose to give up their privacy. They choose to be constantly harangued by companies looking for product reviews, choose to publicize their every moment by posting videos and photos, choose to give up hours of sleep following others' lives and commenting on their day-to-day activities. This is not a cautionary tale against the NSA and drone surveillance. It's a cautionary tale warning us of the dangers inherent in our voluntary relinquishment of privacy.

The Circle's ethic centers around the belief that secrets are bad. 'Has anything good ever come from hidden knowledge?' The Circles creators, called the Wise Men, ask.   If people are not doing something shameful, why should they hide? The Wise Men believe that the concept of privacy was created to mask wrongdoing. Mae slowly falls into their clutches. Like most of the other young, innovative minds at The Circle, she cannot resist the pull of group-think. Total transparency, thus total accountability, is the goal. Privacy and solitude are viewed as shameful and suspect.

The Circle and its many followers certainly have their opponents. Yet these people are seen as backward, unenlightened and antisocial. Mae, in her first days at The Circle, proves to be an exceptional employee, but is chastised repeatedly for not being social enough online, and for not attending The Circle's plethora of evening and weekend functions. Mae, ever the people-pleaser, then embarks upon an exhausting array of online and offline activities. Working by day, managing her Zing feed (The Circle's version of Facebook/Twitter) and hopping between Circle social events in the evening, her schedule is so packed that she doesn't even have time to go home. Rather, she takes advantage of The Circles dormitories, offered free of charge and often stocked with food, clothing, and personal items consistent with the preferences gleaned from each inhabitant's online activity

It gets even creepier. Soon there is talk of mandating every U.S. citizen to have a Circle account and use that to mandate voting. Thinking optimistically, Mae and the Wise Men believe this will ensure full voter participation and allow for politicians to more closely represent the people - or even do away with the need for politicians altogether as society moves toward a direct democracy This is where the book "jumps the shark." Once the story line moves out of the realm of company policy and social conformity to rewriting the Constitution, it all becomes a little absurd.

Fortunately, the shark jumping didn't occur until near the end, so I would conclude by saying that overall Dave Egger's book was an enjoyable read and made valid points about how often we voluntarily put our security and privacy in jeopardy. I revel in the irony of it all. I chuckle to think about how our nation was in an uproar last summer with the Edward Snowden revelations, yet these same uproarious citizens give up a plethora of data and freedom every day through Gmail, Facebook and Twitter. How important is our privacy anyway? I understand the principle is enshrined in the First Amendment, and no one should be forced to give up their privacy. But just like Mae was not forced to attend Circle social functions and post about her every waking moment, the pressure to be a contributing part of her environment essentially drove her into the clutches of full transparency. While the "Wise Men" of the Circle contend that transparency makes us more honest and would argue that the watchful eyes of millions reduce crime and corruption, it also makes our lives infinitely more stressful. We are always putting ourselves out there to be judged, criticized, and yes, even applauded. In doing so we are constantly molding and remolding ourselves into the image of our watchers.  So not only does this foster homogeneity, but it put us dangerously into the clutches of others. Our constant quest for approval, for attention, for validation through the comments, the likes, and the shares, reveals our true insecurity. And if we are seeking security from the "likes" of our followers, we are on very tenacious footing.

While few would deny there are benefits to social media used prudently and in moderation, Eggers' book firmed my resolve to more consistently put the computer away, close out of Facebook, and seek more meaningful avenues of spending my time. How often does social media shift my focus away from the ones whose approval truly matters. There are only a handful of people on this earth whose opinions should really hold any weight. And really, the only "follower" who knows my every move and every thought is God. Ultimately, it's His approval that matters most. So why spend all this time trying to impress others? He already knows I'm not impressive. He created me to depend on Him; but he also gave me gifts and resources that I can use to serve Him and others. Sometimes those gifts do involve social media (i.e. blogging to hone my writing skills) but other times they require my mind and my heart to be totally offline and unplugged.

"Looking for Alaska" by John Green

I'll have to admit, Looking for Alaska was a bit of a letdown after The Fault in our Stars. The characters seemed pretentious and the plot was rather cliche. Though it was a stimulating read, I was, all things considered, rather unimpressed.

The story had the air of a A Separate Peace, The Chocolate War and Dead Poet's Society. The book is not only set in a boarding school, but all the standard conflicts are present. The rich kids maintaining the status quo always antagonize the purer, deeper outcasts whose revolutionary thinking makes them the protagonists. Likewise, this boarding school novel features pilfered cigarettes, alcohol, and an annoying preoccupation with challenging the seemingly inept authority figures. (Maybe I feel this way because I'm a teacher and I don't like those who challenge my authority.) As in other stories, the boarding school is a pressure cooker of external and internal conflicts that drive one particular student to suicide. The main characters grapple with this death in their own ways and ultimately seek answers to the great existential questions facing humanity.

Looking for Alaska is, at its core, a novel of teenage angst. The four main characters are intelligent, yet underprivileged outcasts. Their otherness gives them a keen disdain for the wealthier boarders who retreat to their luxury homes at the end of classes each Friday. Their social group really centers around Alaska, a rebellious, moody, and promiscuous femme fatale who seems to exude an aura of "mystery" - at least according to the hopelessly enamored boy narrating the story. Though Alaska and I share a lot of the same thoughts on male dominance and a similar abhorrence for patriarchy, that's about where the similarities end. To me, Alaska seems like an overly emotional attention-whore who is obsessed with with breaking the rules simply for the sake of breaking the rules. There is really nothing mysterious or alluring about her.

In addition to being underwhelmed by the title character, I also felt like too much of the so-called plot simply centered around their ridiculous pranks and flagrant violation of rules. The conflicts that arose were all conflicts the teens themselves created through their own stupidity or narcissism. Though the characters' drunken rants were peppered with all sorts of philosophical quandaries and a somewhat odd preoccupation with famous last words, I didn't find any of it particularly pithy. Essentially, these kids needed to grow up and stop taking themselves so seriously. (That was not one of the conclusions reached by the end of the book, if indeed conclusions were reached.) In short, I felt that by writing a book about people who take themselves too seriously, John Green gave those types of people the time of day that they didn't deserve.

"My Age of Anxiety: Fear, Hope, Dread, and the Search for Peace of Mind" by Scott Stossel

Imagine a personal memoir, crossed with a college textbook, crossed with a doctoral thesis. That is precisely what you get in My Age of Anxiety. It is a book you read to learn - and learn I did.

Anxiety, in all its forms, is no stranger to 21st century America. More people than you realize are on drugs for anxiety, depression, or both. In his book, Atlantic Monthly editor (and nephew of TV journalist John Stossel) takes us through his harrowing journey through many forms of therapy while wrestling with the pressures of life and navigating the enigma of his anxiety. Stossel has been plagued with phobias since his childhood. Emetophobia, or fear of vomiting, seem to be his most pressing battle, though many others invade his psyche and leave him chained to a series of often debilitating rituals. In addition to illuminating his readers on his own personal struggles, Stossel traces the history of mental illness, including the different theories that each generation has held towards "neuroses."  He tries to offer some explanation as to why this particular epidemic is sweeping our society. Is it really the drug companies manipulating us to buy their placebos? Or is there a chemical/biological component to anxiety and depression? Is it genetic? Or, as Freud would attest, does anxiety arise purely out of our upbringing (and our repressed sexuality)?

There is no easy answer because the brain is a bewildering realm. Many studies in recent years have shown the presence or absence of certain hormones and chemicals can leave one predisposed to anxiety. Yet, as the book seems to conclude, just because one is born with a "worry gene" does not mean that person will definitely have an anxiety disorder, just as having a genetic predisposition to breast cancer does not mean one will necessarily end up with the disease. Stossel delves into a host of studies covering everything from brain chemistry to parenting. Perhaps the most interesting tidbit I gleaned involved the neurotransmitter, Neuropeptide Y (NPY) a chemical that potentially creates resiliency to stress and regulates emotion. Those with higher levels of NPY tend to adapt better to stressful situations. For instance, a study of Navy Seal trainees, revealed that those who graduated from the program also had high levels of NPY. Those who did not make the cut generally had lower levels of NPY in their system. Similarly, studies of NPY have been shown to predict which veterans will end up getting PTSD after serving time on the battlefront. Those with lower levels of NPY are more shaken by war trauma while those with high levels of the neurotransmitter tend to have generally lower levels of empathy, engage in more sexual promiscuity, and are generally more aggressive. However, do not show up at the VA complaining of PTSD symptoms.

This of course led me on my own tangent of reflection. As a historian, I wonder if perhaps the rise in PTSD in the past century is in part a consequence of the wartime drafts and the modern benefits offered to servicemen.  Perhaps some men are just not biologically cut out to be the brave, battlefield warriors epitomized by traditional patriarchy. Some have lower levels of NPY, and arguably, make better husbands, but not great soldiers. However, did the wartime drafts of the 20th century force hundreds of thousands of passive young men into the field? Does the free college tuition, health care benefits, and other perks draw people into the military who would be better suited for a desk job?  Generals Patton and Marshall claimed that modern society was mollycoddling our young men by catering to their mental illnesses. But could it be that we have forced young men to kill people when they were biologically ill-suited for the job?

I also resonated with the studies that discussed how high serotonin levels correlated increased levels of extroversion. People that are brooding and depressive tend to have lower levels of serotonin and prefer to be alone or with smaller groups of people. While this does not always correlate to anxiety disorder, social alienation and anxiety/depression often go hand-in-hand because the same brain chemicals influence both tendencies. However, those same depressive or anxious introverts tend to rate higher on intelligence tests, and often achieve unique and creative feats. Studies have also shown that these mildly obsessive types make the best employees. Furthermore, the great artists and intellectuals of history have often been depressive or plagued by anxiety. Charles Darwin himself, whose theories help us understand how some of these traits have evolved, was plagued by such severe anxiety that after returning from his voyage on the Beagle he never left his home again. However, staying home allowed him to complete the Origin of Species. Many other greats had the same experience. Their phobias and introversion left them tied to the house, but allowed them the time and the peace that they needed to complete the great masterpieces of our age.

So if you wonder why I sit home knitting on Friday nights, and spend most evenings and weekends reading books and blogging about them, well, now you know. My brain doesn't simply doesn't have enough juice to party. Maybe one day all that staying home on weekends will add up to a literary masterpiece. For now though, I've got some pretty great homemade sweaters.