Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Winning Outcomes

That is educational jargon for you. I just came across some brochure for some conference somewhere with that title plastered across the top, promising to make me an all-star teacher in three easy steps. Thus, my satirical tribute and utter disenchanchment with our society’s - and my own - propensity to have faith in our own effort and strategy.

God brought me to Virginia through His own creative means. And there is not a day that goes by that I don't say a little prayer of thanksgiving as I pull into the driveway to Briar Woods (especially on those 6am debate Saturdays). I couldn't have gotten there on my own - without a few miracles along the way. When God caused the people of Ammon, Moab, and Mount Seir to turn upon one another and destroy each other before they even got to Judah, that was again His divine creative plan. And He did a much better job of ensuring victory than the Israelites ever could have done. God told Jehosephat to “stand still.” I still have a hard time wrapping my mind around that. Stand still? Really God? You mean I don’t have to do anything?

God is a lot more competent than we are. The sooner I understand this the better. The sooner we stop striving to control our destiny, the easier it will be to sit back and enjoy Him and the life He’s put us into.

That’s lesson number two of Type-A therapy.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Not Your Fight

I’m going to tell you about Jehosephat. (2 Chronicles 20:1-30) To be quite accurate, however, this is not Jehosephat’s story; its God’s story all around. I’m going to have to dissect this passage in a series of essays because God is uncovering convicting truths every single day.

Installment #1: An Overview from Type-A Perspective

This Scripture resonates hard because I am a stubborn, obsessive-compulsive, hyper-sensitive, and worrisome control freak. I’ve always been this way and have always accepted it as the blessing and curse that got me through high school and college with flying colors. I have a goal - I achieve it. Something needs to get done – I get it done. Before I became a teacher I was responsible for my own success alone, but that’s no longer the case. Welcome to adulthood, Mandy. My job forces me into a position of leadership from 9-4 on weekdays and on most Saturdays. I have to be watching, guiding, monitoring, coaching, and thinking at least three steps ahead of 12-30 equally selfish people at any given time.

So when God says to me, as He did to Jehosephat, “Hey, you don’t have to be in control of this!” it should come as a welcome release. But quite honestly it is not. I like feeling in control. In high school I was the kid that did the whole group project by myself because I didn’t trust anyone well enough to delegate responsibility.

I know that I can get things done well and on a respectable timetable. It’s not that God can’t – but will He get it done my way with my time table, according to my standards? Will God get an “A” at orchestrating my life? Will His plan really solve for more harms and have a greater net benefit than mine? (sorry, debate jargon) Why do I have more faith in myself than in the Creator? Why do I have more faith in my limited abilities, which are only manifested through the power of the Spirit in the first place? Of course, we all know that I make bad decisions and say the wrong thing ALL the time, but yet I’m still fighting God for control of my life.

And the resounding words that encapsulate this entire Scripture ring so true: “for the battle is not yours, but God’s.” (vs15) And again, God says “You will not need to fight in this battle, position yourselves, stand still, and see the salvation of the Lord, who is with you, O Judah and Jerusalem.” (vs17) Do you KNOW how hard it is to stand still!!!! It’s harder for me to sit on the couch on a beautiful Saturday morning than to go out and run five miles. How does one learn to stand still and rely solely on the Lord?

But if Jehosephat, the leader of Judah can learn to stand still then surely we can as well. When Jehosephat learned of impending attack he responded in four ways. He feared. He sought the Lord. He proclaimed a fast. He recruited an army of worshipers to sing praise. This would have gone so much differently had he acted according to his more earthy instincts. It could read: “He feared. He drafted all the young men into the army. The young men of Judah died in a violent siege against the Ammonites.” Had he gone into battle, Jehosephat may have been successful against the Ammonites and Moabites, he may have driven them out in the end, but he never could have done it with the resounding flair that God did. We would not have seen Judah’s army looking on while the warring tribes turned upon each other and defeated themselves.

God does not always take the battle completely out of our hands. In many cases there are tasks that we must accomplish in the “fight.” The Old Testament is filled with depictions of God-ordained warfare between His people and the outsiders. In fact, the Israelites got themselves into trouble for the rest of human history because they were slackers (another idea for another day).

But Jehosephat was not a slacker. I’m convinced that Jehosephat was a type-A overachiever. God needed to teach Jehosephat how to trust. Jehosephat ultimately delighted in the spoils, but could not take the glory. The victory was unquestionably God’s.

When God says “stand still and let me fight this battle” it takes a relentless amount of self-control on my part. It’s a daily process. You wake up to fear or worry. You seek God in prayer. You rein in your mind and heart through spiritual disciplines. You play some worship music in the car and sing His praise. That’s what Jehosephat did and that’s what I’m going to do with this day. By God’s grace that’s what I’m going to do with tomorrow. Nothing less. Nothing more.

Sunday, March 15, 2009

You Cannot Perm this Counterplan

Get ready. There is a cheesy debate analogy coming at you.

In debate we have a plan. The plan supports the resolution. This year our resolution is: “The U.S. Federal government should substantially increase incentives for alternative energy development in the United States.” Our plan is to implement a cap and trade policy that will reduce emissions by 20% of 1990 levels by 2020. We run this when we are affirmative.

Obviously the Negative team must not support the plan. One way to debate the Affirmative’s plan is to run a counterplan. One popular counterplan involves building up more nuclear energy plants across the country (and personally, I agree).

Debate strategy says to permute the counterplan, which means that if you are on the affirmative you need to find a way to do your plan while incorporating the neg’s counterplan. For instance, you could go ahead with tradeable permits and also concentrate on building small nuclear reactors in rural regions to take them off the strained grid (I can’t take credit for that one, just an argument I heard along the way). That way you get all of their solvency plus yours and a substantially greater net benefit.

I actually really like counterplans. My debate captain does not. I don’t really argue with my debate captain (not a good idea to argue with national qualifiers in debate) so we don’t run them. However, we encounter plenty on the Aff. My kids always come to me saying “what should we do if we get the ______ counterplan?” I always say: “Perm it. Now, let’s think of a way to do this.”

In life I’m all about having a plan. I’m type-A, I can’t help it. And if somebody has a better plan, I’ll never admit it, I’ll just find a way to do both.

I live my life as if I were in a debate round with God. I come to Him with a plan. It’s a pretty solid plan from my perspective. Did I mention that I’m type-A? I do things well. I think ahead to possible problems and consequences. I deliver a flawless list of advantages that seem to outweigh any potential negative impacts and I say, “Ok God, prove this plan wrong. Just prove it.”

And then He offers this crazy counterplan and like a good debate coach I’m left trying to perm it. “Ok God, I’ll grant you that it’s a good plan. But so is mine, so let’s do both.”

I’m learning that life is not like debate tournament. What may be good strategy in a debate round is not generally good strategy when seeking the Lord’s will. For some reason the perm isn’t working. We can’t do both His plan and mine and I’m losing the round. Maybe I’ve just got to concede to His plan – or better yet, maybe I should just forfeit this debate entirely. It’s not wise to get into a debate with your trophy-touting debate captain. It’s even more foolish to get into a debate with your sovereign Creator.

Does this make any sense? Maybe this is an obscure analogy that has to rest in the debate realm. But it kind of struck me the other day as I was listening to a couple freshmen run a hemp plan (yes, let’s grow hemp and turn it into biofuel). It actually just excited me that I can turn something as esoteric as policy debate theory into a spiritual analogy.

In closing, I shall offer up some lyrics from a song I’ve been listening to on repeat for the last few weeks:

And I'll be by your side
Wherever you fall
In the dead of night
Whenever you call
And please don't fight
These hands that are holding you

My hands are holding you

-By Your Side, by Tenth Avenue North

When I listen to this song it's like God is saying, "Please Mandy, don't turn this into a debate round. You cannot perm this counterplan. Do not fight me. You are raging against the hands that are holding you up and holding you together."

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

The Cross of Gold

In the election of 1896 Democratic candidate, William Jennings Bryan traveled tirelessly on the campaign trail. He work feverishly, day and night, fighting for the farmer and the blue collar worker. He delivered a famous speech, saying "I will not crucify mankind on a cross of gold." It won acclaim across the country and was hailed as a defining moment for the Democrats and Populists who wanted to create inflation by coining silver and doing away with the gold standard. Frank Lloyd Baum even included a depiction of Bryan as the lion in his pro-populist, allegorical tale, The Wizard of Oz. An economic downturn before the election combined with corporate manipulation led to Bryan's ultimate defeat. Big business won another victory and laissez-faire politicians maintained the gold standard for a little while longer.

The nation was growing rapidly in the late 1800s. This nation, built upon the gold standard, began experiencing a lack of available currency. The population was growing, but the money in circulation was not. That is why many advocated for the coinage of silver. But captains of industry held fast to the gold standard. They argued that a currency backed by gold would prevent inflation. They maintained that gold would prevent detrimental fluctuations in prices, which may benefit the farmer in the short run, but would ultimately harm the economy through easy credit and overspeculation in the long run. This happened in the 1920s.

No one will contest that gold is a valuable resource. Most think of it merely as an aesthetic element, used to gild the halls of old buildings or as precious jewelry. But from an economic perspective gold equals stability. A gold standard ensures economic consistency and steadfastness (at least in theory).

It helps being a history teacher. You may laugh, but having just finished grading AP essays on this very topic, I couldn't help but conjure up images of late 19th century political cartoons while reading Scripture this morning.

Consider the following:
In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, if need be, you have been grieved by various trials, that the genuineness of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it is tested by fire, may be found to praise, honor, and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ, whom having not seen, you love. Though now you do not see Him, yet believing you rejoice with joy inexpressible and full of glory, receiving the end of your faith, the salvation of your souls. 1 Peter 1:6-9

Our faith is much more precious than gold. Think about that. Throughout the history of the world wars have been fought, lands have been discovered and conquered, people have been taken advantage of, sold, raped, killed, and political rivalries have arisen over the attainment of this one resource. And our faith is more precious than that! We should be seeking the refinement of our faith more intensely than England sought colonies. We should be petitioning for genuineness harder than Bryan campaigned for the presidency. To use Bryan's own analogy, we should be laying our plans, our quest for autonomy and self-sufficiency at the feet of the cross of gold.

At our church conference this weekend, Paul Tripp talked a lot about struggles and about the refinement that comes from them. I was reminded of many of the truths I learned throughout the past seven years. Essentially, "struggle is part of the plan." I thought back to my freshman honor's course when Tripp said that "it is not a denial of faith to say 'I'm struggling.' It is a denial of Scripture to say 'I'm not.'" Without this understanding, I don't know how I'd be able to function.

As Tripp reminded us, pain and suffering in themselves are purposeless. It is God that infuses struggle with purpose. Too often, I think, we pray to ask God to remove our trials. But 1 Peter 1.6 tells us to rejoice in them. James 1 says that trials produce steadfastness - like the economic theory behind the gold standard. I've tried to stop praying for God to end struggle. Sometimes I do, when I feel I can't take it anymore - but sometimes it's good to say to God "keep me here until I learn."

And that's what God will do. Two summers ago I prayed for God to end struggle. And he taught me patience. When one medical test came back positive, another came back negative. More tests. More waiting. They were the most agonizing months of my life. My plans for a teaching career in Virginia were suspended in mid-air and finally God brought me to a place where I could put my plans, my autonomy, my ambitions at the foot of the cross.

And just look what He did. He cultivated in me a deeper richer, faith. In the struggles of today I can look back at the struggles of yesterday and know that He is here now, just as He was then. And that is more precious than all the gold in our nations treasury.

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Abiding and Moving Out

This time of year many offices downtown are getting an overhaul. Old employees are being replaced with new ones (much to the chagrin of some of my friends who worked for the old administration). Carpets are getting ripped up and replaced, furniture is getting moved and Obama is changing the curtains in the White House. Now on the one hand I’m incensed at what seems to be a frivolous and costly aesthetic overall at tax payer expense. It all started with Andrew Jackson. He was eager to erase the Federalist-elitist stench away from the John Quincy Adams White House. But that’s a history lesson for another day…

As Obama was being sworn in Tuesday the cameras panned over the White House and showed moving vans parked outside. Movers were efficiently removing Bush’s furniture and bringing Obama’s in. I was impressed by the ease of this transition. I’m sure that when the Obamas came home all of their furniture neatly placed around the Presidents’ living quarters and young interns were at their beck and call to move anything that was out of place. (Although apparently the staff was out to lunch when Dick Cheney decided to move some boxes on his own, only to end up wheelchair-bound) What kind of message would it send to the American people if Obama left everything the same in the White House? What if he did move into the Oval Office without changing the curtains? Maybe it would send the message that he’s the first fiscally responsible president in a long time; from a practical standpoint I’d be impressed. But even today our nation’s morale hinges a lot less on practicality and a lot more on pomp and circumstance, metaphor and symbolism. If we’re looking to the President to usher in change he can’t keep the White House looking the same. When Bush moves his stuff out, Obama has to move his stuff in.

I submit to you the following verses and you’ll see where I’m going with this:

First, heed the words of Romans 6: 10-14 – “For the death that He died He died to sin, once for all; but the life that He lives, He lives to God. Likewise you also, reckon yourselves to be dead indeed to sin, but alive to God in Christ Jesus our Lord. Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body, that you should obey it in its lusts. And do not present your members as instruments of unrighteousness to sin, but present yourselves to God as being alive from the dead and your members as instruments of righteousness to God. For sin shall not have dominion over you, for you are not under the law but under grace.”

-- Grace is the new administration. It’s time for a change. Just some more Scriptural backup:

Romans 8:10 “And if Christ is in you, the body is dead because of sin, but the Spirit is life because of righteousness.”

Romans 13:12-14 – “Therefore let us cast off the works of darkness and let us put on the armor of light…But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to fulfill its lusts.”

2 Cor. 5:21 – “For He made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.”

So here’s what I’m getting from this. Under sin our old nature was governed by lusts, temporal pleasures and all those things that the Bible is telling us to cast off. Why? Because we have a new nature! But even as someone who has been a follower of Christ for a long time, it’s still easy to live according to that old, carnal nature. And when that happens I'm living according to a nature that is actually not in me anymore! God has imputed a new spirit onto me. God has changed the administration. Why then do I often live according to those things that govern the carnal mind?

Perhaps if we’re not daily replacing the old stuff with new stuff we’re not going to have an effective transition. Maybe we have a new president, but if he didn’t replace the Bush cabinet with an Obama cabinet how far would that promised “change” go? Or if Obama just emptied out Bush’s cabinet and didn’t replace them at all then we’d just have Obama – and the new puppy - in the executive department. Great. But here’s the thing - if we’re going to make a complete transition of our hearts then we need to fill our minds and our hours with new things - things that are godly. We need to fill our minds with the words of Scripture and our time with service and spiritual disciplines.

Essentially, Christ needs to abide in us, all day, every day. “If you abide in me and my words abide in you, you will ask what you desire (read: godliness) and it shall be done for you. By me the My Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit, so you will be my disciples.” –John 15: 7-8

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Broken

Judges 1: The book of Judges chronicles the brokenness of God's world. God's perfect world, created only a few centuries earlier, has come to such despicable degradation and filth. Here are some examples, just in one chapter of how the world was broken:
• Doubting God after Joshua's death
• Cutting off Adoni-Bezek's thumbs and toes and having him eat under the table
• Caleb giving his daughter as a prize for war
• The daughter pressuring and manipulating her new husband into getting land
• The tribes of Israel failed to drive out and kills the people that they conquered according to God's command
• Dwelling among the pagan tribes

In the midst of all of this sin we see the words "and the Lord was with Judah." Judah and Simeon actually followed God's commands. But verse 22 says "and the Lord was with them", referring to the tribe of Benjamin. So, even though the Benjamites sinned by not driving out the Canaanites, God was still with them. Throughout the rest of the book, and the rest of human history that God is still with these sinful people. It's true though, they messed up their lives. I wonder how the current political situation would look today had they followed God's command to exterminate the Canaanites. I wonder if the Diaspora and the pogroms and the Holocaust and Muslim terrorism would have happened. From Judges on Israel will face centuries of conflict because they refused to drive out these pagans. But even this, we know, is part of God's good plan. As Dr. Mills always said, it is part of the story. A story that will ultimately give the most glory to God. And to paraphrase John Piper - sin is part of God's plan. He does not condone it, but it can have a part in His work in the world. Working in an through the sin of mankind God shows just how good He really is.

Friday, November 21, 2008

Starbucks.

Starbucks, downtown DC. It is a good place to find an inauspicious corner and observe the mosaic of life. Two men over there are networking, getting their foot in the door to the new administration. Two old hippie-types enter in flagrantly anti-Bush t-shirts. People are texting, conversing with their friends across the table and across the world on matters great and small. A line forms at the counter as people seek repose from the blustery November afternoon. And I look down at my coffee cup, sip the bitter roast and see in it a powerful metaphor.

I’m really growing to enjoy black coffee. For the past two weeks I’ve abstained from all cream and sugar and found in it an immensely enlightening experience. I used sugar (substitutes) to numb my taste buds to the bitterness, but at the same time escaped a lot of the richness in the grind. Now I can really taste coffee. I can tell a good roast from an inferior one. I love my coffee and its satisfying bitterness.

I am reminded here of an article I read by Carolyn McCulley called Eat Bitter. Read it if you have a moment. And from there I turn to 2 Corinthians 12:10 where Paul, speaking of his thorn in the flesh rejoiced even in its persistence, for when he was weak, then he became strong. James 2 says, “Count is all joy my brothers when you face trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness.”

It’s easy to douse suffering in the sweeteners of life. These are things that aren’t really good for us, though not bad in moderation. However, their flaw is that they mask the taste of the bitter cup of suffering. It is this suffering that produces the gold, refined through the fire. In attempting to eradicate the bitterness we also miss the richness. The richness of living in weakness, in pain, in the hand of God Almighty who sustains his children in weakness. Now, lest you misunderstand, I’m not suggesting that we live complacently in bitter circumstances brought about by sin in our lives. In those times we should be cutting off the hand and gouging the eye. But when God places us in circumstances completely within His will we should, as Jim Eliot so aptly told Elizabeth, “be all there. Live to the hilt every situation you believe to be the will of God.”

DC is a “type-A” city. You notice this if you sit in Starbucks for three seconds. Relationships are about networking, time is of the essence, we’re all trying to get ahead, to make the most of our lives, our talents, our resources. We strive for a painless, prosperous life and see this as our right – “life liberty and the pursuit of happiness.” Those words are, after all, enshrined in this great city. Unfortunately, this “type-A” mentality of mine often seeps into my spiritual life. When I’m suffering I feel that I’m not “getting ahead” and I’ll do whatever necessary to change that. Immediately! I often find myself striving to change circumstances on my own timetable, outside of God’s perfect provision. But when we step back, when we drink the black coffee, the bitter cup, there we find a richness beyond compare. We find that God’s greatest gifts are bestowed in moments of weakness and brokenness.

Paul says, “For I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content: I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need.” (Philippians 4:11-12) When I can say this with Paul it is then that I find grace beyond compare. I find a God who is richer, a Word that is more powerful, a heart weakened and malleable.

So, if you are tempted to cease rejoicing in suffering - for you, there is a Starbucks just around the corner.